Tuesday, September 18, 2007

I love my daddy

This was my son's favorite book..while he seen momma scanning it he looked at it and asked me to keep it..but he did not want her to read it to me. I longed to read it to him..for him to be as excited about books as he was before he went to school..there is a part in the book..that goes.Daddy loves pickles...and I love pickles to..to which I would go...eeeyou...you love pickles..and it would make him giggle and giggle..when I read it..
There was so many favorite stories..
I am sure you are familiar with the gingerbread man..one.
you can run, run, run just as fast as you can..but you can't catch me...I am the gingerbread man...
that was always a fun one..requested to be read so many times..
Sammy's first report card read.."Joy to Teach, Loves to Learn"
What happened to this little boy of mine.
I know
but can I change it.
What is important to me now is ..him...I feel like I failed to protect him from people I should have been able to trust with him, that I was to forgiving...
My first now is to get back his self esteem and confidence..and the little boy..who loved to learn...
that is going to take some time..but I know I can do it..
I speak very openly about things that concern me..It is important that I say this...It is important to me to talk about what has happened to him..it helps me to understand..it allows me to reach out to others who can help me better understand..it allows others who to have experienced things to know..that they are not alone..
One thing..I need to say..is that I do not want anyone to think I am looking for pity or sympathy in life..that is not the case..but if I do go on a self pity trip..I will post..my pity party..today..in the title..
Your words to me..bring me wisdom..they help me learn..they keep me from feeling alone..especially now...I can not get out much anymore..
okay..whoa...helen ready is coming in my mind..I am women..hear me roar..
The parts of Sammy's life I have shared with you..are only the parts that I can talk about without crying..allot more happened to him...along the way...that still needs to be said..
and I hope to share with you as time passes...at all times..your comments are appreciated,
and help me in many ways...
knowledge without heart..is not wisdom..
I hope I will not bore you..along life's way.
Thank you.
I have a great new project in mind for Sammy..a starting place..which I hope to get up on his blog this week..once we have done the home work on it..
There is this really cool women in our town..Isobelle..who really has done so much volunteer wise to help our community..everything from guides and brownies..to our local library..
Well she gave me a map of the world today..which is going to be a part of Sammy's new home school project..and hopefully going to renew his curiosity in life..
Thank you Isobelle!
Chat with you soon..
My love and kind regards, Joanne

Thursday, September 13, 2007


All Photo bend it's used in today's post can be purchased at Lara's lovely dusty bear shop..here!
They are very practically and an awesome scrap item that I find many uses for.
Kindness is the most beautiful gift in life we have to offer one another..
This was a ramp that was built for Sammy several years ago..by the Salvation Army's Men's fellowship...in Happy Valley- Goose Bay.

Did It Hurt!

Did it hurt?
What do you think...tell me...
If you were his mother and he came home from school and you were undressing him from his school clothes and were lifting his arm out of his sleeve and he told you owey..which is how he spoke back then for hurt..and you discovered this..
Each of his ribs were bruised inside.
I was upset and took the photo and emailed the principle..asking how did this happen..?
on his inquiry I found out that he was being tested by the school educational psychologist, and was fidgeting in his chair tucking his feet under him and out from under him trying to get comfortable on the slippery metal chair and he fell...Apparently he cried but she gave him and ice cream and he stopped..no one examined him...no one called home and said your child is hurt..she returned him to his homeroom class and told the teacher he fell but was fine..
Sammy has no reflex defense movements on his left side...not one soul reached out to keep him from falling..okay..so they did not catch him falling..but any mother..the first thing she does is check to see if the child is injured even if the child says I am okay..we look..don't we..
This is another one of the reasons, my child fears going to school, no one cares if he is safe.
now we are only going to sightly get into..my child going missing from school part..of it all
when he was supposed to be on the special needs bus..but was found at 7 years of age..on the North West River Bridge..and that is a big bridge..trying to find his way to his mommas work..
That was only one of three times he went missing from school that year..
okay lets talk about a little 7 year old child who can't zip his own coat yet with one hand..and the parents who called me saying he was left outside alone with his coat not zipped waiting for the special needs bus..to come..now how much trouble is it for a student aid..to bend down and zip up a one handed child's coat..and put his mittens on..
Tip of the Ice burg
9 year old child with cerebral palsy found frozen on path leading to Grand Lake, North West River.
This could have been what could have happened.
I am sitting at my place of work..I get a phone call...your child has gone missing from school...mom..well where is he we don't know..he ran away from school and is missing..mom..well how come you don't know where he is..
He is off school premises so he is no longer our responsibility...????????
Mom..what..he could die out there ..it is 28 below zero..he has no coat, no mitts, no boots on...and you did not go after him because it is not your responsibility?
Well what do you want us to do ms. vanderMeij..call the RCMP...?
mom..no by the time they arrive here from Goose Bay he could be dead from hypothermia or lost up grand lake...
must go and arrange a search party..for him..bye
We were lucky and we did find Sammy quickly ..and he was at the head of the path leading up Grand Lake..he was exposed to - 28 winter weather for over 1o minutes..his tears was frozen in his face and clothes..and he had the beginnings of frost bite on his cheek..he was shivering...like mad..but his daddy..held him close to his body until his body warmed up...
You know..what seems so wrong in all this..is that if..I as a mother..was the one that these things that has happened to Sammy..happened in my care..he would taken away from me ...
so why..is this allowed to happen in a school..?
I have been as high as the child advocates office in Newfoundland..with no success in improving things for my child..I have talked to as many outside the school as I can..but still nothing changes...
So do you think this has had an effect..and may be the reason..my child..hates school..

This is the way we learn

This is the way we learn.
This is a photo that was sent to me last year, proudly taken by a teacher who wanted to show me how my child was using a smart board in school to learn.

While I appreciated, that efforts were being made to help my child, what do you think as a mother I saw, I saw how my child was presented in school in front of his peers, with his underwear showing and his backside showing. As Sammy's mother this is not something I would ever let him be presented to the world like..when we go places together, and he gets out of the cars..if his clothes are shifted..the first thing I do is prompt him to fix them..Sammy can dress himself but because he can't use his left hand and struggles with dressing his left side ..he frequently needs to be reminded of that side of his body.

My child had not gone into a regular classroom with his peers for 4 years now..since when he was in gym...another student pulled his pants down leaving him naked in front of the whole class..the student who did this..did it to see if Sammy had shit in his pants. Sammy only has the use of one hand to defend himself..Sammy was never offered any counselling to heal from this assault on him.

He has never returned to a normal classroom environment since. The school has had 4 years to get him integrated back into the classroom...and still have not succeeded in doing it..How traumatic was this event on this child..Do any one have any suggestions as to how traumatic it was.

Sammy needs help with toileting still...although he is 11 he has problems with wiping himself..from the time he entered school, despite letters, visiting specialist, doctors and rehab teams writing and telling the school the child needs help in the bathroom, he still do not receive it..and has come to a point now..where he will not let them help him..because it was made an object of ridicule and pain for him..it damaged his self esteem...the other children teased him when he came from the bathroom smelling like feces..and when it burn his little bum...he scratched at it..and his hands would smell from it and make the smell of him worst for the other children...Am I right in thinking my child deserves better then this.

Can you understand as a mother how I must feel..about this..

I have made application to home school Sammy..Please wish success and pray that it will be approved..I can no longer put my child in a place...that do not care for him or his basic personal care needs or has such little respect for him...

Day of Beginnings

A Day of New Beginnings
How little we know what the future will bring
when our little ones are born into this world
We hold them with love in our hearts
and hope nothing but the best for them.

I remember so much putting my hand over his little heart and his daddy putting his hand on top of mine and feeling the love of God flowing between us as we were eternally bonded in Gods Love

The love of a father, mother and child.

You look forward to watching them grow, make their first steps, seeing their first smile and saying their first words.

There is no miracle more beautiful.

This photo is one of my most cherished photos which I carry in my wallet.

It is the first time he was held by his parents, seconds after his birth.

I looked at Mario with tears falling from those beautiful blue eyes of his.

Proud to place Sammy in my arms.

This is family, this is what life is all about.

My Sunshine, my rain, my morning dew, my evening stars.

Through good times and through hard times

Faith keeps you strong

when life lets you down

You carry your woes with the grace of a women.

Understanding his forgiveness as you forgive others.

Understanding his faith is your faith and that the strength you gain by letting and trusting in the Lord, that he will give you not more then you can handle, you push yourself forward until you look back and realize that there were indeed two footprints in the sand.

For the stars Brag Book Pages

For The Stars Brag Book Pages.
Thank you for visiting and hope you enjoy the brag pages!
To view these bragpages in use feel free to visit Sammy's new blog..Here.